Chapter 171: Chapter 128: A Gift for the Players (Making up for the three missed updates from yesterday)_1

[This crappy game destroyed my youth, making me carry a criminal record prematurely. I won’t even be able to apply for a civil servant job now.]

[No worries, I asked the prison guard. The prison guard said it won’t go on the record. But I’m not sure about this info because the prison guard also asked me what a ‘record’ is.]

[Has anyone else managed to escape from prison successfully?]

[Nope, the prison guards are too strong. I’d estimate it will take a decent amount of gameplay to pull off a successful escape.]

[Alright, then I’ll work hard at the game and strive to escape from prison as soon as possible.]

[…Do you think, just maybe, there’s a chance that by the time you do, you won’t be locked up anymore?]

[…Then I’ll be the Number One Escapist in the world!]

In the game’s chat group, Qiu Yu vented about today’s events and complained about the game with others who had shared experiences, then returned to the game to think about how to play next.

Refunds are out of the question, never in this lifetime will I get a refund, especially since the game is so good and realistic. They even welcomed me with a big prison package, Qiu Yu couldn’t think of any reasons to ask for a refund.

But being locked up in a cell is too boring; after all, it seemed all he could do there was increase his Boredom Level, which only made him more boring.

I mean, why on earth is “Boredom” a basic skill…

Basic skills in the game are ones you have from the beginning, like breathing, walking, running, and so forth.

Advanced skills, on the other hand, are skills you have to learn, such as blacksmithing, sword forging, swordsmanship, etc.

Watching his Boredom Level slowly rise, Qiu Yu started to think about competing for the title of the Number One Bored Person in the world.

But after seeing the description of the title and the characters related to it, he realized that even this title was quite competitive.

After thinking for a while, he felt he couldn’t go on being so bored.

He had work during the day, he couldn’t waste such good time at night in a cell; he had to find an opportunity to get out and about.

Stepping out of the cell through a hole in the door, he saw the Number One Prison Guard at the entrance drunk as a skunk, lying across a plank bed in deep sleep, snoring away.

He tapped the ground with his left foot and lifted his right foot high against the door frame. The sleeping poses looked terrible, but Qiu Yu had the feeling that the guard’s actions might have some deeper meaning.

Since it doesn’t hurt to try things in the game, he imitated the guard and twisted his body into a strange pose.

“What are you doing?”

Turning his head, Qiu Yu saw First Under Heaven looking at him with confusion.

“Nothing, just can’t sleep, so I came over to imitate you,” he replied.

“And what did you achieve with that imitation?”

“Absolutely nothing.”

“I thought so. You can’t get much from imitating my bad sleeping posture. However, I see you’ve got some nerve, so I’ll give you a job. If you do it well, I might teach you something.”

“Please go on, big brother.”

First Under Heaven came closer and whispered, “I have a brother who did something not so nice, and he’s going to be beheaded tomorrow. But he’s a filial son and wants to go home tonight to care for his mother. If you stand in for him tonight, he’ll definitely come back and replace you tomorrow. Then I’ll owe you a favor, and whichever Martial Arts you want to learn, I’ll teach you.”

“But you’re a prison guard!”

“So what, prison guards can’t have social interactions? Prison guards can’t break the law? Besides, he’ll definitely come back, round up, and it’s like nothing happened.”

Qiu Yu thought for a moment, then asked seriously, “What did your brother do?”

“I won’t lie to you, he butchered a few thugs who were harassing his mother. It was a crime of passion.”

“Righteous fellow. But how did he get caught?”

“One of those thugs was the illegitimate son of a local wealthy merchant. He would hang out with riffraff when bored, and after he was killed, my brother got caught. Just bad luck all around. The merchant paid some Silver Coins, and the cops brought him back, and that’s that.”

Qiu Yu looked at First Under Heaven, feeling his brother’s business outside was definitely not as simple as visiting their mother. Perhaps there was something else he had to do.

But then he thought again and said to the prison guard, “To be honest, your brother’s case seems rather honourable, and I’m willing to stand in for him on the execution grounds.”

“Young man, you mustn’t! When you end up in the Underworld and people ask how you died, if you say you violated curfew and got beheaded, what will they think of us?”

“No problem; I know the art of reincarnation. After my head is chopped off, once my neck starts itching, it will naturally grow back, so don’t worry about it.”

First Under Heaven looked at Qiu Yu, not sure if he was mad or if his own ears were faulty, to hear such bizarre words.

In the end, though, he was persuaded by Qiu Yu, who led him to the neighboring cell to see the man locked inside.

Undoing the man’s shackles, First Under Heaven said to him, “Get going, this brother thinks highly of your righteousness and has decided to take your place in death.”

The man flew into a rage upon hearing this and asked the prison guard, “How could you agree to something like this?”

The guard didn’t waste words. He stepped forward, kicked the man down, dislocated his joints, and assembled them into a large square. He then bowed to Qiu Yu and said, “Thanks, young brother! If you really can revive from death, come find me in the cell. I’ll teach you any Martial Arts I know and can even volunteer to be your sparring partner. If you don’t, I’ll try to find your body tonight and ensure you get a proper corpse.”