Time went by intimidatingly fast, Ziyu Ai no longer saw Zhishu in a doctor-patient way; he no longer kept close attention on how bad the situation he was in; he no longer planned for the worst. But even so, he clearly knew that… The life of a terminal stage leukemia patient who doesn’t take medical treatment or medications couldn’t last long.

It had been a week since Wenxu Jiang called. That man didn’t call him again but it was probably the right move. If Wenxu Jiang had the last bit of his conscientiousness, he would feel guilty to Zhishu He in a condition like that.

Zhishu He still went to the french windows to enjoy the little gardens from the second floor when his mind was clear; sometimes, the dog and kitties would sneak into the garden and damaged the plants when it lacked Ziyu Ai’s protection. Every time he looked down through the transparent window, Zhishu He felt calm inside as if he floated in the air totally relaxed.

He had found a book that quite interested him a few days ago. He had been reading it for several days; it was a book with pictures, called 100 Places You Must Go In Your Life.

Ziyu Ai sat next to him when he read the book and his dark brown eyes dimmed as he saw the title.

Zhishu He noticed; he smiled and rubbed one side of Ziyu’s waist with his foot. His navy blue coral velvet sock failed to cover his snow-white ankle, which was extremely pretty.

The tickles on He’s foot from Ziyu Ai finally erased the deep sorrow in He’s eyes.

“I’ll give this book to you once I finish reading it,” Zhishu He smiled, “You gotta go to every place in this book twice, okay?”

‘The second time… is a remedy.’

“Tomorrow is your birthday.” Ziyu Ai didn’t answer him, but leaned on Zhishu’s shoulder and snuggled with him intimately.

Zhishu He nodded, “I’ve been waiting for very long. The birthday present you prepared has been tantalizing me for more than half a month.”

Ziyu Ai kissed his cheek in a smile; his eyes were full of happiness and love, “You have been tantalizing me for half a year.”

Zhishu He rolled his eyes at him and went back to his book. He had enough of those words but the pictures cheered him up. He had read this book over and over.

Zhishu He was quite cheerful today; he didn’t feel drowsy. When he read enough, he leaned on Ziyu Ai and let his mind fly.

Ziyu Ai held Zhishu He in his arms so that he could lean on his chest. “What’s on your mind?” When he talked, his chest gently shook. The shake numbed Zhishu’s ear.

“You.”

“I don’t buy it.”

“Really,” Zhishu He smiled, “My life’s worth it. I end up with such a good man.”

“What do you, end up with?” Ziyu Ai felt a bit unhappy, “You keep your mind drifting away. You talk, I hurt.”

Zhishu He chuckled; the heat from his mouth warmed Ziyu’s heart.

Their dinner was little wontons Ziyu made, which Zhishu ate quite a lot. He seemed to have a better appetite than before.

“You like wontons?” Ziyu Ai gave him half a bowl of seaweed and shelled shrimp soup.

Zhishu He was lost, he lowered his head, scooping the soup again and again. “Not really, I just…” Zhishu He tilted his head, looking pretty distressed.

Ziyu Ai realized something and jealousy budded on his heart, but he didn’t show it in his words. “Alright, finish the soup. I’ll cook you more tomorrow, I’ve made plenty of wontons.”

Zhishu He didn’t say anything, he slowly finished the soup.

“Can I have a bath tonight?” Zhishu He asked Ziyu Ai after he helped him wash the bowls. He had showers lately; Ziyu Ai didn’t allow him to take a bath, lest he’d get dizzy.

“Don’t take too long.” Ziyu Ai cleaned the kitchen sink and replied to him gently, “Watch out for the slippery floor when you get out.”

Zhishu He hummed a yes and left.

It wasn’t a short bath. Up until Ziyu Ai finished the cleaning and took his shower, wasn’t Zhishu finished yet.

Ziyu Ai flicked through the book page by page in bed and called Zhishu He’s name every once in a while. He was still worried about him.

Zhishu He was sick of answering him but he knew Ziyu Ai cared about him. He stayed in the water for a while longer, had a quick shower and came out.

His skin got wrinkle and his cheeks were red. He dried his hair with a towel carefully next to Ziyu.

“How come you smell so good?” Ziyu looked at him from behind and exhaled.

“I used that lush bath bomb,” Zhishu’s voice was a bit throaty and inadvertently alluring. He smiled, “I think I smell good, too.”

Zhishu He leaned over, very close to Ziyu Ai; tiny water droplets pattered on Ziyu Ai’s face.

Ziyu Ai thought Zhishu He was teasing him because he was in a good mood but before he said anything, a mild kiss lay on his forehead. “Just smell.”

“Knock it off,” Ziyu Ai’s expression suddenly changed, “Listen to me, go to bed.” He patted on the bed next to him, “We gotta get up early tomorrow. It’s your birthday.”

The bedlight was on; the evasiveness of Ziyu Ai’s was very obvious. He was struggling, panic and uneasy.

Zhishu He’s next kiss was on Ziyu Ai’s lips. His eyes were gentle, his black pupils reflected a little brightness of the light but that was like the most shining star in the universe. “Am I not good enough for you?”

“Except for Wenxu Jiang… There was no one else.”

“Zhishu, you know I don’t…” Ziyu Ai was very agitated; he couldn’t organize his words; he couldn’t handle the heartache. He loved Zhishu He to death. He wanted to touch him, he wanted to have him, but he wanted more to be the very person that wouldn’t take something from him in his life.

Ziyu Ai just wanted to be good to him. He dared not to think about the rest.

Zhishu He sighed lightly. He kissed down little by little from his jaw and tried to unbutton Ziyu Ai’s pajama.

Ziyu Ai couldn’t resist Zhishu’s gentleness, his warm breath on his sensitive neck, and his fragrance. He rolled over to press Zhishu under him. His intense kisses fell on Zhishu’s eyes and brows and cheeks. “Zhishu… Little Shu…Baby…”

Ziyu Ai didn’t even know why he cried; his tears were all over Zhishu’s face. He muttered countless times “I love you” near Zhishu’s ears.

It was Ziyu’s nature to be gentle and careful. When he got inside Zhishu, Zhishu didn’t feel too much pain but still, he subconsciously clenched the bed-sheet hard.

“Zhushu…” Ziyu Ai licked and kissed Zhishu’s Adam’s apple. Strong breaths were mixed with the doctor’s confession of love; he kept saying it and didn’t change his words all night long. “I love you…”

Zhishu’s mind drifted between clear and blurred, he watched Ziyu Ai’s face in the pale yellow light, involuntarily panted and moaned quietly and got himself ready to be overwhelmed by strong passion.

“D-doctor Ai.” Zhishu He loosened his grips, on the wrinkled sheet, his arms encircled Ziyu Ai’s neck, smiled at Ai in a trance.