Ch. 2 How To Be A Cat (2)

[What is this!]

This body—could it be called a body?—was as light as air.

I looked down at my hand and saw a dim grayness. Not only was I glowing, but I was also half-transparent.

Oh my god! I was like a ghost…a soul now. I wanted to faint, but I could not. A soul left behind had no such physical capability.

I missed the feeling of sensation. My hands and feet were trembling, but my transparent fingertips seemed to blur like smoke.

[No.]

I clutched my hand and cried out for fear of disappearing. The small white bird studied me and spoke once more.

[Something’s wrong…]

[What do you mean?]

[No matter how many humans there are, I can’t believe you even have parents with the same names…it’s a mess.]

Its voice turned contrite.

[It’s my mistake. I apologize.]

Wait…did that mean I was not supposed to die?

But I was dead now. A scream escaped me.

[No way, then get me back! My body…why am I like this!]

[…I can’t return you.]

[Why not? If I’m not supposed to die, then I should live, right?]

[Your body is already dead, which was why I was able to retrieve your soul. A soul can only pass through a dying body.]

This all sounded crazy. I desperately wished I could faint.

The angel of death spoke in a more resolute tone.

[I have no choice but to create a new one.]

[Create…a new one?!]

Here I was, a drowning man in the open sea, grasping at a piece of straw for rescue. I had no choice but to rely on this angel of death.

It continued to speak.

[A new human body for you. I’ve erased the car and your body altogether, and there is no wreckage in your world. The humans will only think you are missing.]

Erase? My body? My car? That monthly payment…well, you can’t beat that!

[That’s fine, then. How long will it take to rebuild my body?]

[I’m sorry, but my creation isn’t my specialty.]

[Just tell me how long…!]

[At the earliest, one year.]

I looked at the bird in shock. There was nothing more unfair than this. But what choice did I have? I needed that damned angel of death, despite the way it so casually spoke of my situation. It may have killed me by mistake, but it was still some kind of mystical figure.

[I can build the body sooner with the help of another emissary or superior…but if this matter is discovered, neither you nor I can live. The otherworld doesn’t tolerate a single cog out of place in the wheel of life.]

Did that mean I would have to float around as a soul for a year while it finished building a new body?

I looked down at myself. I was not standing on the ground and there was no sensation in my feet. It was in an incredible state of being. This definitely wasn’t possible with a hidden camera program.

[But I’m innocent here.]

[So you want to die like that?]

I couldn’t find an answer at that moment. I felt bad about being dead, but what did it mean to die?

[Human, I thank you for not dying. By that, I mean your soul has not crossed into the afterlife. If it had been, I will be destroyed for my mistake, and you will spend your lifespan in the room of reincarnation. The otherworld will not bring you back.]

I was struck dumb by the bird’s words. There were no other options for me. The thoughts in my head were so dizzying that it was hard to know what to be angry with and what to feel sorry for. I was dead, and this angel of death was the only thing that could bring me back. I had assumed its work would only take a day or two, but a whole year? By then, everyone would notice that something was wrong. something was wrong. Even if I was supposed to be gone on a trip for a month or two, my whereabouts would be questioned.

[I’ll be gone all that time…]

[You’ll be considered missing for a year. After that, you can return to your normal life, but for now, your soul will remain here. If you roam the human world, you’ll be considered a demon.]

I didn’t know whether to be relieved or not.

[I have work to do! And I have a family waiting for me…]

[Do I have to repeat myself? The best I can do is rebuild your body. What more do you want?]

The bird’s beady, emotionless eyes stared back at me, but my anger couldn’t be contained.

[I can’t stay in this place for one year and do nothing. I’ll go crazy. You talk like its someone else’s concern and expect me to say, ‘Yes! Alright!’ Do you understand me?!]

The angel of death had the decency to look ashamed at my outburst.

[So what do you want to do? This is the only place where your lost soul can be the most secure! Do you want to be food for demons? Or do you want to be turned into a demon and then taken by another angel of death? Then your human self won’t be able to reincarnate for a year and you’ll have to go through hell! Either I try to hide the evidence of my mistake, or we both suffer!]

The small bird was hardly an intimidating presence, but its voice rose, as if to insist that this had all been a mistake. Both sides felt like the other was being grossly unfair to their situation.

Fine. I would give in to my bizarre circumstances. I wanted to live. I could do so again, I just had to be dead for a while! I pulled together my resolve—

[Still…]

I wanted to cry, but there were no tears. Such was the condition of a soul.

The bird seemed to sense my mood, and it flew around me and perched on my shoulder. I thought it would pass through my body, but it was an angel of death after all.

[I’m deeply sorry.]

[Sorry?!]

[…And there’s a problem. It seems like your human soul is very weak. If I keep you alone here, your soul will be destroyed. You will become like the air itself.]

To be like air. My mind spiraled at the thought. I desperately needed a body, and so I clasped my hands and begged to the angel of death.

[Do something. Help me…Please, give me body. This state…I’m so scared. I can’t!]

To merely exist that way terrified me. I wanted to live again. I needed to go back to my world. The face of a person who would be anxiously searching for me for a year floated in my mind—Mom.

Finally, the bird spoke.

[Well…there is something I can do.]

[Really? I can have a body?]

[Yes. Just not your original body.]

[You mean a dead man’s body, or something like that?]

[That’s only possible in human dramas. If it were so easy, I would have suggested it beforehand. It’s a terrible crime, equivalent to murder by human standards.]

I gave a wet sob as I reached out to the bird, hoping it would change its mind. It flapped it wings and flew out of my reach, then scolded me as if I were a fool.

[I know you are impatient, but it’s impossible to rebuild your human body in less than a year.]

[…Why one year? Can’t you do it any sooner?]

[It takes ten months to build the framework of the body. The amount of time a human grows in a mother’s belly cannot be changed, unless it’s done by God. Like how water is water and fire is fire, it is a set law of the Universe.]

[Then what about the remaining two months?]

[That’s the time it will take to age your body again. I will make a newborn baby out of a sculpture, and place it in the pure world of immortals. Time there runs much faster than in the human world. Two months there is the equivalent of 20 years in the human world. So in all, it takes a year if I hurry.]

[…So, if I spend my ten months in that place…?]

[Then you will become a being of purity. That body won’t hold up in the dirty world of humans. Do I have to explain that an angel can’t live in the human world?]

In truth, I probably only understood about half of what it was saying. I swallowed nervously as I looked at my hands and feet, and the angel of death cocked its head at me.

[You look nervous.]

[Alright then…give me another body. I hate it this way! Look at my hand!]

The bird flapped its wings and took a few contemplative circles in the grey gloom. Then, it plunged its beak into the air, tearing a void into space. Something black rolled out and floated in the air.

[Try this.]

It was a crow with its wings folded. It looked more like a stuffed taxidermied body than a corpse, and it began to drift towards me. I looked at it with wide eyes.

[Try this? How?]

[I mean go inside. I’ve used this body before…and if it’s an ideal match, you can stay.]

[How do I get in?]

[Touch it. Then you’ll see.]

I was surprised by the angel of death’s words, but I raised my hand to touch the crow. A crackle split the air, and my hand immediately bounced right off and turned into smoke, before reforming its shape again.

I gasped and took a step backwards. Pain stung my hand, even if I was only a soul. What the hell was this? Was I going to be stuffed into that thing?

[It hurts!]

[Is that not the right shape? Then try this.]

Next, a form of a black cat appeared out of thin air and slowly floated in front of me. My hand still smarted and I didn’t immediately touch it, but the body came towards me of its own volition like a magnet. I felt a strange sensation of being sucked in, and the dull feeling in my body gave way to tightening muscles.

“Myang?” (How is it?)

[Oh, that fits very nicely. You won’t need to be isolated to help you acclimatize.]

“Myaaa!” (Eek!)

I screamed in surprise. There was something coming from behind me that wasn’t there before! It was poking upwards. What on earth?!

[Because you were a cat in your previous life.]

“Myaaag?!” (Eh?!)

It was an unexpected past!