Chapter 138: At that moment, my face is full of the tears
Translator: Lionwwang Editor: Lionwwang
It’s the second day on the raft. I almost have no energy to move. I haven’t eaten any food or water all day and night. I feel like I don’t want to move, even the little finger, but just lying down, also feeling uncomfortable too.
It’s very uncomfortable to be exposed under the sun on the raft. Because the weather is bright and not hot, the sea breeze is also a little cool. But when people are exposed to the sun for a long time, the water in the body evaporates quickly, and my lips are all dry and cracked.
I try to lick my lips with my tongue. Unfortunately, it’s also very dry. The friction between lips and tongues is like two dry sponges.
Phoenix remains motionless, just humming from time to time. I call her, and she does not answer. I frown, try to move over and reach for her forehead.
The water on her body has already dried up, and there is a strange smell on her clothes and body, especially on her hair, as if there is a layer of salt frost.
Her forehead is hot, don’t know whether she has a fever. My palms have lost their sharper sense, just feel hot. But maybe it’s my delusion.
“Am I dying?” Her voice is so weak that I have to lean over her head to hear it.
“I don’t know.” I answer her in a dry voice and swallowing hard if I have any more. I’m feeling to have a fire in my throat, “Maybe we’re all dying.”
She turns to face me, with a grey and pale face. But there’s an unusual glow in her eyes, and then she is asking me in a very serious tone, “Little 5, do you want to die?”
“No, nobody wants to die.” I say lightly, “If you want to live a little longer, we’d better not talk. It’s easy to dry up if you talk too much.”
“Is there any difference?” She squeezes out a smile which is uglier than crying. To be honest, she looks very haggard, very haggard. Originally, she was not very beautiful, but very charming, and very good at dressing up. Woman in her profession, dressing up very well. But now her face looks very old. The wrinkles on the corners of her eyes and her forehead are obvious. Her skin also loses luster and elasticity.
She seems to have grown ten years in a flash.
“Do you have any wishes before you die?” She is asking in a low voice.
“Yes.” Instead of looking at her, I look up at the sky, but then I close my eyes because the sun is so glaring, “There are too many wishes.”
“For example?”
I sigh, although my throat is so dry that I really don’t want to talk. But I think what she said is also right… Is there any difference? We’re all going to die anyway.
“My greatest wish is to have an iced coke now!” I lick my lips hard and swallowing hard. Suddenly, I come to my mind, draw a line with my hand and say, “The kind of big bottle, once you unscrew the cap, a burst of airs is rushing up! Then put some ice and into the cup, swallowing them in one gulp! As soon as swallowing Coke, you are also biting those ice…” The more I say, the more I get involved, the more I can’t help closing my eyes and starting to fantasize.
I’m just fantasizing for a while, and suddenly I feel that there is no sound in my ear. Looking around and I find that she has fainted. I rush over and patting her on the face.
She is opening her eyes reluctantly, wakes up quietly, staring at me, the focus in her eyes is pointing on me slowly. She says: “I just… Fell asleep? I’m so tired that I always want to close my eyes, but I… dare not…” Suddenly she takes a long breath, “I know… As long as I sleep, I might not be able to wake up anymore.”
I sigh and watching her silently.
She was sick and weak and has been soaking in the sea for so long. Now she has not eaten or drunk anything. It seems that she is going to die very soon!
She gives a sudden laugh. Her smile, don’t know why. I always feel a little cruel inside. She’s staringing at me and says, “I never imagine we’re going to die together.”
I have no word and am even not able to laugh.
Indeed, I never expect that we two completely unrelated people would eventually die together here!
“I’m afraid of the death.” She says earnestly that her voice is already very low, and I have to put my ears very close to hear it. She opens her lips with great effort, “But… There’s somebody to die with me. I’m a little better. I’m relieved that you will die with me!” The light in her eyes is evil. But her eyes are falling on my face, and there is a hint of hesitation.
I smile bitterly.
I force a rueful smile.
Suddenly she lifts her finger lightly and struggling. I look at her and finally realize that she wants to sit up: “What are you doing? Don’t move!”
“I want to… want to take a look.” Suddenly a strange glow is coming from her face, and in her dead grey eyes, just like a dry river, suddenly flowing back into the current, “I want to take one more look at the world…”
I sigh, holding her in my hands and let her lean on the edge of the raft. She is trembling all the time, so heavy and has no strength at all.
Looking around, her eyes are filled with disappointment. Because there is nothing around, except the vast seawater only!
She closes her eyes slowly. To be honest, I thought she is going to die like this. Because she breathes are weakly and her chest doesn’t fluctuate. I really think she’s already dead.
But when I’m just thinking, suddenly she opens her eyes again. Although her eyes have scattered, she is still trying to look for something. I am close to her, but it seems that she can hardly focus her eyes on my face.
“Little 5!” Don’t know where she gets the strength, suddenly, she is saying, “I’m regretting!”
“For what?”
“You don’t deserve to die.” There’s something almost crazy in her eyes, “I think you’re going to die with me. Someone company me to go to hell, I won’t be afraid then. But I’m regreting now. You shouldn’t die.”
Her language is fluent! I know it’s the last radiance of the setting sun!
“You shouldn’t die like that.” She is trying to smile, “You’re a good man. A good man shouldn’t die like that. And you have helped me three times from the ship to here. I can’t drag you to die with me. That’s too sinful for me.”
I sigh. It seems that she has gone mad before her death. I can’t bear to say anything, so I just follow her and whispering, “OK, I’ll try not to die.”
She’s laughing again, somewhat mysteriously, and then struggling to raise her fingertips, pointing to the left pocket of her trousers!
“I just wanted to let you die with me without telling you. But I can’t. You helped me, so I changed my mind.” She is gasping almost at every word, “Look over there.”
There’s a zipper in that pocket. I frown and pull it open. I immediately see something inside! That’s a water bottle!
I’m immediately exclaiming and taking out the bottle! God bless, the water inside is almost full! Just a little less!
I immediately recall that the bottle was given to me by the Vietnamese before I have boarded the stowaway ship. And that day, Phoenix was taken out by those bastards, when she came back, I gave her this bottle of water to let her wash her body!
“You… didn’t use?” I’m holding the bottle and staring at her.
She is smiling wildly in her eyes and shaking her head slowly: “I wanted to use it, but I thought I’ve already been dirty. It doesn’t matter whether I wash it or not…” She’s bursting into tears, looking at me, “I was wrong! I was really wrong!”
She’s saying with struggling: “I’ve done too many wrong things. Even just now, I was thinking of not telling you, dragging you to die with me! I’m a bitch! A bitch!” She suddenly opens her mouth, puts her hand in and biting hard.
I quickly break her hand out, but she has been breathing out withnot breathing in. Her lips are still trembling; her eyes have lost the lights. But she seems to be saying something before she dies.
I immediately bend down, ears come close to her lips: “What do you want to say? What else do you want to say?”
She seems to be saying a long list of numbers, and I can tell that they are two sets of numbers! She repeats it over and over again. Although her breath is very weak, but she seems very persistent and refusing to die.
I finally understand what her meant, shouting to her loudly: “I remember! I’ve kept it in mind! You can rest assured, I’ve remembered!”
She hears my voice, and there’s a relief smile on her face: “… Bank account… Password… Money… Good man… Should not die…”
I have no feelings for her. But at the moment, looking at the woman’s dying struggle, there is a sense of sadness in my heart. I feel a sour is rushing up. Suddenly she opens her eyes, exhausting all her strength and shouting: “Next life, I’ll not be a woman!”
This shouting is hoarseness and exhaustion. After shouting, her head tiltes, and she dies.
I stay there and shaking her hard for a few times. She does not move anymore. I measure her pulse and heartbeat, as well as her breathing. They all stop.
I’m sure she’s really dead.
This woman, who has no grudge or friendship with me, dying in front of me. She wasn’t a good person, and don’t know how many people were hurt by what she had done. But when I’m watching this woman dying in front of me, I still can’t help being confused. I’m feeling lost.
I’m sitting blankly, leaning aside and gasping for a while before pinching the bottle in my hand. The hard feeling of the bottle is immediately refreshing me.
I feel my hands are trembling hard! I try to open the bottle. With a kind of almost pious feeling, I put the bottle to my mouth.
The cool liquid is flowing into my mouth, immediately moistening the dry mouth for too long, and then sliping down the esophagus with a trace of coolness, as if extinguishing the flame in my throat!
If there is God in the world, then I dare to say that at this moment, I see God is smiling at me in the sky!
Because the water in this bottle is not the fresh water, but more useful than fresh water!
The water is a little sweet and a little salty. I immediately recognize, this is the oral glucose water! A kind of inexplicable emotion is surging up in my heart, that is the human instinct desire to survive!
At this moment, my face is full of the tears.