Chapter 137: Chapter 136

Even though she felt terrible at the moment, she still could swallow the food. She was busy devouring the food as if she was like a man suffering from pregorexia. Nonetheless, she became hungry strangely. Maybe because she felt an emptiness in her heart that she didn’t feel she had eaten enough after emptying all the plates on the table.

Anyway, she chewed food with a pale expression. But she could barely taste the food that she liked so much

As soon as she returned to her room after the meal, she vomited everything.

“Lady!”

Surprised, Cordelli screamed. Although she wanted to say she was okay, she was too weak to say anything. sudden nausea squeezed her whole body. She coughed while

Cordelli and the maids quickly raised her. Without any resistance, she let herself dragged by them. She barely sat on the edge of the bed with her body limp like a broken marionette.

The maids went out with her dirty dress and carpet. The floor was also cleared up.

Marianne slowly blinked her spiritless eyes, blankly watching them clean up. While she changed into her pajamas, washed her mouth and hands, and had a medical checkup by the doctor, who was hurriedly called in, she remained still like a corpse.

She really didn’t want to think about anything. Her continuous breathing even bothered her. Her heartbeat that she usually did not recognize felt loud.

Pounding. Huuu.

Pounding. Huuu.

Pounding. Huuu….

“Lady Marie!”

After some time, Cordelli called her with a gentle voice.

Only then was she taken back to reality from a remote world. She was just breathing helplessly, but the surroundings were quiet and the room was dark. Only yellowish candles were emitting a soft light.

“You didn’t answer when I called you many times. What were you thinking so hard about?”

“…”

“According to the doctor, it’s because you ate the food too quickly. He said he couldn’t find any other problem after checking your condition. So, don’t worry and sleep well. You’ll be fine tomorrow morning.”

Cordelli pulled the blanket up over her chin on the bed and covered her.

“If you’re uncomfortable at dawn, you have to shake the bell. I’ll be right back. Okay?”

She stroked her hair with her warm hands. After she tapped her chest moving up and down unstably, Cordelli slowly got up.

Marianne urgently grabbed her before she could leave. When she grabbed her strongly, Cordelli staggered and fell halfway over the bed.

“Lady?”

“Cordelli… Please sleep beside me today.”

So far, Marianne hadn’t said anything like a wax doll, then she suddenly asked her an unexpected favor. Cordelli couldn’t understand her behavior at all.

She asked with a slightly worried expression, “As a rule, you asked to get out quickly when I asked to sleep beside you. How come you’re asking me for such a favor today?”

“Just today alone… I don’t want to sleep alone. Can you, please?”

Her voice trembled faintly when she asked back. Cordelli looked at her face, narrowing her eyebrows.

She could notice the strange anxiety on her face. Although she was not sure what the reason was, obviously there was something unusual about Marianne. After coming up to the capital, Marianne went through ups and downs, but she never asked her for this kind of request.

In fact, Cordelli felt more comfortable and relieved when Marianne was easily surprised and stubborn like she used to be. As her closest maid, Cordelli also had a sense of duty that she should always be with Marianne and comfort her when the lady was looking for her to rely on.

“Why not? I can do anything for you when you want it.”

“Then come up here and lie beside me.”

Marianne pulled her arms. Cordelli was dragged into the bed without changing her clothes.

The two shared their pillows, lying down and facing each other. Their two round eyes blinked slowly as they stared at each other up close.

Soon, Marianne’s eyes were moist and shiny. Although the light was dim, they were too close for her to hide her tears.

“Don’t cry, Lady…” Codelli comforted her maturely.

Normally Cordelli would have asked her why she was crying, but she felt that she should not do so now.

Marianne seemed to be in danger of collapsing at the slightest disturbance.

Instead of replying, Marianne blinked a couple more times. Tears dropped suddenly.

Cordelli reached out and wiped the tears dropped on her nose.

“Were you surprised a lot because you suddenly got sick?”

She still didn’t reply. Nevertheless, Cordelli continued to comfort her.

“My mother used to say that when one was sick, one was supposed to feel lonely easily. She advised me that if I felt like that, I should feel better if I had deep sleep.”

“…”

“Let me pray right here next to you all night that you can have a good dream. So, don’t cry. Okay?”

Cordelli twisted her body and reached out. She hugged Marianne tightly.

Marianne snuggled up to her warm arms and curled her shoulders. She held onto Cordelli’s collar with her slender fingers.

“Cordelli…”

Marianne’s voice calling her name shook like a boat on angry waves.

“I… I don’t want to be sick…”

Marianne bit her lip hard. Soon she felt bitter in her mouth, recalling her conversation with Mrs. Renault.

< I think it would be more unusual for the late emperor not to resent your father.>

She felt like Mrs. Renault’s sharp response stabbed her body with a dagger. If what she said was true, her father was a kind of betrayer and bystander.

<As your father, I want you to be safe and happy for a long, long time. I never wanted anything else. I’m serious.>

Marianne believed that her father was sincere as much as he loved her. So, she had to admit she could not be relieved of the stigma of her father’s betrayal.

He was someone who had to endure the days without any light while her father only had his daughter in the shadowless land.

At that moment, she also recalled Eckart’s words.

<You have to pay the price for what you know as well as what you don’t know.>

<You should always keep in mind that you can do or suffer from something terrible.>

‘Was this the price of what I knew, like he said? That ‘terrible’ thing I had been doing to the emperor? If so, could I blame Eckart who, according to Ober, wished for the misfortune of the Kling family?’

While lost in thoughts, Marianne suddenly said, “I’m afraid I’m going to be more ill. What can I do…”

Of course she was not. That would be impossible.

Her trembling voice was soon mixed with her crying. She began to weep as she was so choked up with overwhelming sorrow.

She discovered the secrets of someone she trusted the most in the world. She realized that her life, which was always full of love, was a sand castle built on someone’s pain. And that person was none other than Eckart whom she wanted to love and make happy.

It was only natural that her heart and mind would crumble in sorrow and self-reproach.

“Lady…”

Cordelli hugged Marianne more tightly, who was trembling like a wounded bird. She finally realized what her lovely lady was really afraid of. She knew that Marianne’s fear was not physical pain, but her wounded heart. She realized that there was a big, heavy shade that her lady couldn’t easily explain to her as they had grown up together for a lifetime. She realized that the cruel shade was biting her like a hunting dog.

“No. You won’t be sick. By tomorrow morning, you will feel it was all like a dream.”

“Boohoo…I don’t want to be sick… I should not be greedy…Boohoo…”

“Do not worry. You won’t be sick at all. I promise you. Please don’t cry, lady.”

Cordelli embraced Marianne harder.

‘Please, Lord, our goddess, Lady Marianne’s deceased mother, please feel pitiful for her. Why do you let her go through all this hardship? As you already know, there is no better woman than our lady. Please help her stop crying. Please…’

Cordelli prayed for her hundreds of times, tapping her on the shoulder gently. Even after she cried herself to sleep until dawn, she stayed beside her for a long time.

Infusing unguaranteed hope over and over again into her heart, who was being eaten away from the unknown pain…That was all she could do at this moment.

* * *

“…Good enough. Write up what I said and tell the Public Information Bureau to send this out as early as this evening. As we have to set the date of the final matches, tell the deputy chamberlain and senior protocol officials to attend the relevant meeting tomorrow.”

“Sure, will do.”

Edgedio, the protocol officer at the palace, politely received the document and returned to his seat. Originally, Colin was supposed to take his place, but he was forced to take vacation leave for three days because of Jed’s bluffing.

Although he spent only several days with Colin, Duke Kling felt somewhat strange whenever the protocol officer, not Colin, was sitting there.